Will the Real Wentworth Miller Please Stand Up!

Within just a short time after posting "Tripping Through Twitterland" over the Easter holiday weekend, I was inundated with comments and e-mails stating that @millerwentworth posing as actor Wentworth Miller on Twitter is a fake, as presumably are the other so-called cast members from "Prison Break" (PB) that follow (or followed) each other on Twitter, as well as the so-called "official" username for the TV show (@pbofficial).

Early Monday morning (April 13), I did a quick Google search for Miller's handlers and faxed a letter to his publicist at PMK/HBH. I copied the letter via fax to his attorney and emailed a copy to Twitter. In the letter, I asked the publicist for a confirmation that Wentworth Miller is actually sending Tweets with the @millerwentworth username. If not, my letter stated, then the parties should take appropriate action to end this elaborate fraud taking place as it is an insult to PB fans (including myself) throughout the world.

I asked Miller's agent Jennifer Allen for a brief statement for my blog to set the record straight, but I have had no reply from her (or Miller's attorney) as of press time.

At around 12:00 Noon PDT on April 13, I noticed that earlier posts from @AmauryNolasco, posing as PB star Amaury Nolasco, disappeared from my Twitter. I thought to myself, "Oh, maybe someone finally shut this scam down." When I clicked on his profile, I received “That page doesn’t exist!" I then tried accessing the profile for @millerwentworth and also received the same message. @pbofficial is still up, but since all of these fake people were following each other, it has to be a fake too.

Needless to say, it is also highly likely that Dominic Purcell(@DominicTweets) was also a fake since he was following and being followed by the fake "Wentworth Miller." DominicTwets' postings, however, actually had me convinced weeks ago that he was the real deal because of family photos he was posting via Twitpic. It just seemed so authentic. My thinking at the time was, if he was real, so were the co-stars.

Playing short-term practical jokes or an April Fool's prank is fine, but the ongoing stunt of one person (or maybe a group of people) impersonating several actors isn't funny. It's an outright fraud, plain and simple, and should have been shut down a lot sooner.

People in Twitterland should take responsibility for the community by sending complaints to support@twitter.com when things just don't look right. Twitter obviously can't monitor everyone in the community 24/7, so it's up to the common folk (like me) and others to take action to keep the Twitter community as real as possible.

A shout out and thanks to those of you who contacted me on this issue.

Tripping Through Twitterland

Disclaimer: I can't promise that the peeps mentioned in this article are still in Twitterland. The world of Twitter is very similar to Munchkinland: "My! People come and go so quickly here!"

Just because I've been inundated with media stories about Octomon doesn't give me the urge to have eight babies; however, I just had to find out what all the fuss was over Twitter, a social networking service on the Wild Weird Web.

Colleagues and friends keep asking me whether I have a Facebook or MySpace page and I tell them, "I'm not signing up for one more thing on the Internet." Shortly after that, Twitter kept appearing in my daily read of Reuters, UPI, TMZ, you name it. So I thought to myself, "What the fuck, let's see what the orgasm is all about."

Twitter has its own lingo (Twitterspeak), but as a newbie, I'm not up to speed on that yet, so forgive me if I get it wrong (or make up my own). Please see the end of this article for Twitter usernames (or Twitnames) for some of those mentioned in this article.

Ashton Kutcher
Kutcher, the King of Twitter (with nearly 800,000 followers as of this writing), is honouring the "Twit with the mostest" with the Platinum Twitter Award (PTA). He's taking nominations from fellow Twits (or Twitterers) through the end of April. Since Kutcher has been rather busy filming "Five Killers" in France, to make it easier for him to get through all the nominations, he asks that anyone who wants to nominate a fellow Twit to be sure to include #pta in their Tweet nomination so that he can easily keep track of the nominations. There's a brief video of Kutcher discussing the PTA which one can view by clicking here.

I had a helluva time figuring all this out, but what one does if they want to nominate someone for the PTA -- and it can be confusing to us new Twits -- in that blank space where one types a new message or replies to another Twit, simply type "@aplusk #pta" (without quotes) followed by something like "Nominate @crusader666 because his life wouldn't be the same without a small silver-coloured bird."

Kutcher's Twitter followers are growing faster than an 18-year-old boy on Viagra. When I started Tweeting just two weeks ago, his followers were "only" around 600,000. Amazing that in that short period of time, they have grown by nearly 200,000.

Some news really is learned on Twitter first. I first learned from Kutcher (via Twitter) about the unanimous Iowa Supreme Court decision in favor of same-sex marriages. He is a native Iowan and huge supporter of civil rights, so I presume he was monitoring his hometown paper online the day the decision was expected.

Also, before it was covered in the mainstream news, I was able to follow Tweets from Kutcher about his "wifey" (his word) Demi Moore helping save the life of a California women in distress. More about that later.

Kutcher publicly opposed Proposition 8, a California ballot initiative which did pass last November, barring same-sex marriages. Quite the activist, he is now raising awareness about malaria in his Tweets and asking his followers to make small donations to end this disease once and for all by visiting Malaria No More. The honorary chairs will remain nameless on my blog, but one of the board members is Timothy Shriver (Chairman, Special Olympics), so that works for me.

Sandie Guy
I am reminded of that commercial that Secretary of State Hilary Clinton aired during the presidential primaries when she was running against Obama: Who do you want answering the phone at the White House at 3:00 AM?
For a California woman suffering from depression and suicidal tendencies, she chose actress Demi Moore to cry out for help in Twitterland.

On one recent morning at around 3:00 AM PDT, Sandie Guy (whose Twitter profile showed her residing in the Silicon Valley), sent a distressful and detailed reply post (Retweet, I think is the term) to actress Moore about how Guy was going to kill herself. Moore posted it for all of her fans to see, and it was not long before some of them contacted police and Guy was found unharmed at her home and taken to a facility for evaluation.

Evidently, her mental illness wasn't too serious, because that very evening, Guy was at home and sending Tweets out to state she had been discharged from the unnamed psychiatric facility and thanked everyone who has helped her with her problems.

Out of curiosity, I followed Sandie Guy for a few days, but then on April 6, I noticed she was no longer on my "following" list. When I tried to confirm her account via a Twitter search, the results came back with "That page doesn't exist!," so I guess she had too much attention from all the news articles about her ordeal.

"Prison Break" Celebs
Kutcher may be the Twitking, but he definitely isn't the only game in Twitterland. I follow three stars (now down to two) of the hit TV program "Prison Break" (which sadly comes to an end this spring): Wentworth Miller (Michael Scofield), Dominic Purcell (Lincoln Burrows), and Amaury Nolasco (Fernando Sucre).

These guys have great senses of humour and their posts are generally entertaining. As a result of following their Tweets, I found a very funny and racy South Park song about tacos, burritos, and the Mexican border! You can listen to it too by clicking here.

Miller was also gracious enough to post a link to a "super cool" rap, "Prison Break Anthem," by Kaye Styles.

At one point recently, Miller teased his followers with a post asking whether he should delete his Twitter. Not long after the post (probably because of the negative replies he received), he simply posted "staying." As of this writing, Miller has more than 3,500 followers, and I imagine that should pick up considerably when "Prison Break" starts airing its remaining episodes this month after a long hiatus. Unlike Miller, though, it appears Dominic Purcell has flown the Twitter coop, because an error message is received when trying to access his profile.

"Winchester Brothers"
No, one won't find hunky "Supernatural" stars Jared Padalecki or Jensen Ackles (say that three times fast) Tweeting here, but rather Elizabeth & Katherine, two very dedicated fans of the program and, of course, die-hard fans of the very yummy actors who play brothers Dean and Sam Winchester on this hit TV show.

Lots of links for pix and other cool show-related stuff can be found by following "Winchester Brothers" (see usernames below). Elizabeth & Katherine are very cordial and friendly. They also have a "Supernatural" blog, which I haven't had a chance to read yet, but am adding it to my list of things to do.

"Winchester Brothers" on Twitter will definitely supplement the life of any "Supernatural" fan!

Ben Gleib
Call me an ignoramus (you won't be the first), but I literally don't know this guy from Adam. He started following me (on Twitter, not in the streets) a few days before this article went to press. He's some kind of comedian or something? Anywho, I will check out his web site and then search Zune Marketplace to find out whether his material is available for me to listen to on my Zune after a hectic day of proofreading legal documents for a living.

John Mayer
Last (and least, I hate to admit, especially since I often fantasize about him dating my niece).

I have been a huge fan of Mayer for years because his musical talents are truly amazing (and he's easy on the eyes). Awhile back, I listened to an exclusive interview he did on XM Satellite Radio, and I was very impressed. However, his Tweets leave much to be desired.

After international publicity about him Tweeting, I started following him for about a week, but then stopped because I was bored to tears. Not sure if he was having a "bad week" or what. Sorry, John, but consider sticking with what you're great at: singing, playing the guitar, and smiling!

Evidently, Mayer's Tweets don't put everyone to sleep, as he is quickly approaching 600,000 followers at the time of this article! Maybe he will bypass Kutcher and be crowned the new Twitter King? Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the biggest Twit of all?

To Mayer's credit, it was the publicity about him Tweeting (and his former girlfriend bitching about it) that got me to finally sign up for Twitter. So Mayer was the hook, but Ashton, Wentworth, and the "Winchester Brothers" clinched the deal for me.

It would bee cool if there were a Twitter school or Twit-tutor available to help some of us figure all this out because I often feel I am in the dark on how to best follow certain people and their followers without spending 20 hours a day in Twitterland.

The Keys to Twitterland (usernames):
(Note: To view a profile (or Twitterfile), simply insert ones username at the end of the final slash in http://www.twitter.com/)

Ashton Kutcher (aplusk)
Wentworth Miller (millerwentworth)
Dominic Purcell (was DominicTweets)
Amaury Nolasco (AmauryNolasco)
Prison Break (Official) (pbofficial)
Winchester Brothers (_supernatural_)
Ben Gleib (bengleib)
Demi Moore (mrskutcher)
Sandie Guy (was sandieguy)
John Mayer (johncmayer)

Oh, and don't forget me:
http://www.twitter.com/crusader666

Octomom Gets Eaten by Octopus: Film at 11!

April Fool's!

All kidding aside, enough is enough already. I don't think a day has gone by without the world being fed news about a woman whose greatest accomplishment is unloading 8 babies from her vagina at a time. Not sure what's worse: Incessant news stories about Octomom or the nonstop international news stories regarding the Twittering activity of celebs like music heartthrob John Mayer and singer/actress Courtney Love.

Anywho, since Octomom is a story that just won't die (unless someone carries out their threats against her), here are some of my provoking thoughts about Nadia Sudafed (or whatever her name is) that might actually make for good Twittering, but since I do not consider myself much of a twit, I'll put it on my blog instead.

Octomom now has 14 kids and Save the Children UK has the gall to bitch and moan about Madonna adopting ONE more kid from impoverished Malawi. What's up with that?

Of course, slick, butch lawyeress Gloria Allwrong manages to find her way into any event that is this huge. To her credit, however, she is on the correct side in this battle; making sure that the welfare of these 8 children is protected by the appropriate child service agencies.

Without further adieu:

Crusader's Octomom Top 10

10) Will the Octobabies have a genetic propensity to also have multiple babies in one sitting?

9) Eight is Enough, but she has 14 kids already!

8) After having 8 babies at basically the same time, Octomom's whatsit must be so stretched out that no man will ever be intimate with her again!

7) What ever happened to the one-baby-per-vagina-per-day rule?

6) Why abortion education should be mandatory in school, beginning in kindergarten!

5) This lady unloaded more fallout than the A-bomb at Hiroshima.

4) Octomom's "exit wound" of her whatsit has got to be bigger and wider than anything caused from a round of AK-47 bullets!

3) I have loggers that weigh more than any of her babies at birth.

2) Gives an entirely new meaning to Octopussy.

And, finally, No. 1:
If God wanted women to have 8 babies at one time, she would have given women 8 tits for breastfeeding and a larger vagina. Duh!